The Importance of Parental Guidance in Proverbs 6

Our last passage in Proverbs spoke of the six things the Lord hates, and the seventh that tops the charts. In the next few verses of the sixth chapter, Solomon paints a beautiful word picture of the value of parental guidance, which protects children from those who would lead them astray.

My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching. Bind them on your heart always; tie them around your neck. When you walk, they will lead you; when you lie down, they will watch over you; and when you awake, they will talk with you. For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life. (Proverbs 6:20-23 ESV)

The strength of a united home

As the wisest man in the world, Solomon could have easily told his son to follow only his instructions. Wasn’t he the one who had all the wisdom from God? But he doesn’t do that. Instead, he tells his son that he must obey not only what his father has told him to do, but also to remember the teaching of his mother. In this, Solomon reveals his true wisdom: Children need fathers and mothers.

I know that in saying this, many of you are struggling, either because you were raised by a single parent or you are one yourself, raising your children. It’s a reality, and that doesn’t mean you or your children are lesser for it. In His grace, God provides extra wisdom to the one parent and other adults who come alongside children as needed. Still, studies and God’s Word reveal the truth of this verse. Mothers provide what fathers can’t and vice versa.

That said, children have a responsibility too, and even with both parents in the home, many choose to ignore their father’s commands or their mother’s teaching. A two-parent home is no guarantee for a well-balanced and well-behaved child. That’s why Solomon is telling his son, “You’ve got to remember and do what we say. It’s on you, son.”

Tricks to retaining teaching

The next verse is a visual of how his son should hold on to these teachings in order to obey them.

• Bind them on your heart,
• Tie them around your neck.

These directions are helpful for parental advice and godly advice from the Word of God. I think about how many sayings of my parents remain with me years after their death. They said them a lot, so I remembered. Scripture memorisation is our way of using repetition to hide God’s Word in our hearts and minds. The longest chapter in the Bible is Psalm 119, and every verse is about God’s Word and His commands, and their value for our lives.

I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. (Psalm 119:11)

Remembering what our Heavenly Father has told us through His Word helps us to live in a way that pleases him, just as we would an earthly parent.

I am a visual learner; I have to write things down to remember them. The more I see a verse, the better able I am to recall it when needed. Solomon’s concept of tying parental teaching around the neck is that visual we need to remember. I use note cards and Post-It notes in my car and on mirrors to see and remember verses. Other people paint verses on the walls of their homes, over beds and doorframes.

What will it take for you to hide God’s Word in your heart and keep it always before you?

The lighted path of God’s Word

The next two verses reveal to his son the value of parental commands and teaching: they serve as light to guide you in the journey of life. Without a moral compass, given by parents and the Word of God, children are quick to lose their way. They are not sure which way to go and are easily deceived, distracted, and led to things that lead to devastation and destruction.

The lamp of parental guidance and God’s Word brings light that is with a child when they walk, when they sleep, and when they open their mouths. It enlightens every aspect of their day and night. Included in a parent’s teaching is discipline. No child obeys a hundred per cent of the time, and thus, parents must correct and reprove. This is for their good and part of the process of remembering. The same with our Heavenly Father. He reproves us because He loves us.

Another throwback to the psalms makes me wonder if, in learning these poems and songs, Solomon gained much of his insight and wisdom. This one seems to fit perfectly in his instructions to his son:

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. (Psalm 119:105)

We learn from these verses how God uses parents as the primary source of teaching children the commands and ways of God, correcting them as needed. If you are a parent, take seriously your role in shaping your children to live in line with God’s Word, helping them to live in the light and able to stand strong against the darkness.

Grace and Peace

If you missed the last Friday Focus post, click HERE, or start this Walking in Wisdom series from the beginning.